In Transition

Since my decision to stop serious training for freediving, I’ve begun to enjoy the distinction between ‘training’ and ‘exercise’ but the inner athlete is still lagging behind. I’m still mindful of my carb intake before a workout (to the gram!) and pack my recovery drink and protein for afterwards out of habit.

I’m lost without my bag of floats, fins and paddles at the pool. My foam roller is getting plenty of use and I’m still checking my heart rate daily. I’ve stopped following a training plan, but when I go to the gym or the pool I still do the same workouts. The best bit, however, is that moment I decide the TV thriller that’s just started is far more appealing than sweating it down the gym, and not feeling guilty!

You can take the athlete out of training but you can’t take the training out of an athlete.

love to move, so I’m never going to become a coach potato giving up committed training, but it is a blessing to be able to pick and choose when I feel like exercising rather than be compelled by a spreadsheet. Exercise to me means being free to run for as long as I like, knowing it won’t affect the next training session as I’ll wait until I’m ready for that. Exercise means playing with the new equipment at the gym like the heavy ropes or punch bag, knowing its not really relevant to my sport but it’s a giggle nonetheless. Most importantly, exercise means staying healthy and eating well, sleeping like a log and smiling often. That’s why the first thing I’ll do on Christmas morning is run through the woods, feeling totally alive and happy.

Merry Christmas everyone! x

Acceptance

I'm two weeks away from a freediving competition and by now I'd normally be training hard and specific to prepare for the event. There was a time I could write a training plan for six days out of seven and hit every session spot on. Those days are gone (for now). There's no plan at the moment as there'd be little point, I'm missing more training opportunities than I attend... sigh!

What I'd ideally like to do:
Monday - monofin apnea e.g. CO2 tolerance training
Tuesday - swim (am), strength & conditioning (pm)
Wednesday - apnea or finswimming
Thursday - swim (am), strength training with PT (pm)
Friday - club pool session e.g. Low O2 tolerance training or static
Saturday - cross train e.g. run, then yoga
Sunday - rest

And here's how the last few weeks actually went:

Monday - monofin CO2 table week one; second week I'm exhausted despite a quiet weekend and just watch TV
Tuesday - week one - recovering from the training night before; week two - I ate the wrong foods and felt sick all day - just managed some yoga
Wednesday - the first week I'm stuck in Birmingham overnight for work; second week I manage a 7km run at lunchtime which feels great. Only problem is I'm a freediver not a runner!!
Thursday - strength session with PT goes well, the week before I'd wanted to train in the hotel gym but too exhausted from travelling and a full day meeting
Friday - week one I'm home after 2 days away, just flop in front of TV, exhausted. This week I'm feeling more energised and have been in the office or at home for work, no travelling. Head off to the pool for a tough CO2 tolerance table 16 x 50m no fins
Saturday - duvet day last week. This week I manage a pool session doing longer distance apnea swims.
Sunday - resting

Ever the optimist, I'm glad I'm managing some sessions, and getting OK results. 

The hardest part of this thyroid condition in my view is going from a previously active person to such variability in energy levels. I don't remember travelling being so much of a drain but it is now. Eating away from home is challenging and I invariably end up eating something I shouldn't which adds to the fatigue or belly discomfort. Still, I know I'm lucky as some people suffering from hypothyroid have little or no energy and worse symptoms. I'm learning to accept what I can do, and love myself when I can't.

Rules for the journey

The art of training well is to take it seriously, with full commitment and professional discipline, whilst retaining a lightness of spirit so as not to take it too seriously... obviously not an easy line to tread! All athletes are at risk of the dreaded plague of over-training, none more so than those who have a tendency to seek perfection, which is a large proportion as sport naturally attracts high achievers. Saying that however, some of the world's best swimmers (Michael Phelps, Ryan Lochte) have barely taken a day out of training in years, while many other pros have missed entire seasons with burnout.

I put a lot of pressure on myself this year because I've taken physical, emotional and financial risks to try to reach my goals. Had I known I was getting sick with hypothyroidism and anaemia, I wouldn't have pushed so hard to make every training session. Now it's time to redress the balance.

So as I start up my training again I have some new rules to continue my journey;

1) Train softly - let my body command when to exercise and when to rest. Often it's bleedin' obvious when I need a rest day, but for the days when I'm not sure I'll keep track of my heart rate variability which shows whether I'm under stress or not. I can take time out guilt-free.

2) Food is medicine - eat wholesome, nutritious homemade food whenever possible

3) Feed up, not down - now that I'm on a gluten and dairy-free diet I need to be careful that I'm eating enough carbs and protein to fuel my training. That means careful planning around training sessions; more carbs in the morning and higher protein at night

4) Gratitude - when I'm grateful I find my grace. Be happy for every day I can train and accept with kindness the days I need to rest

5) No pride, no shame - I'm not defined by how far I swim, how heavy a weight I can lift or whether I win or lose. My diving is about exploring my own potential. It's about being the best I can be, and no comparisons with anyone else. It doesn't need to be perfect, but it does need to be 100% right for me.

Overcoming mental blocks to training

One of the most obvious symptoms of burnout or over-training is low motivation to train, especially in your competitive sport of choice. As exercise addicts we can often keep training in another sport if the fatigue isn't so bad, mainly to keep the buzz of being fit but steering clear of the mental block around our main sport. That perfectly describes my summer!

Haunted by the black line!

I've enjoyed many swims around the lakes local to Bristol, runs along the harbourside and under Brunel's bridge and a few stand-up paddleboard sessions. What I've been avoiding however is the pool - any brief thoughts of the black line have been quickly followed by excuses to do something else.

So I've decided its time to get back to it. I've been freediving to depth for most of the summer so it's not as if I haven't been holding my breath. What I'm facing is purely a mental block - a bit of fear, uncertainty and shame leftover from June's major disappointment.

A friend of mine contacted me to say they'd be training alone at the local pool and did I want to come down for a session. After a bit of procrastinating and grumbling I accepted. I continued grumbling as I slipped into my pool suit but strangely as I put on my neck weight and nose clip I stepped into a familiar role and suddenly it felt as if I was back where I belonged. A couple of 25m lengths later, which felt super comfortable, I had a smile on my face! Even 50m lengths didn't feel so bad, despite my CO2 tolerance probably being pretty low now after several months break. I particularly enjoyed dolphin swimming in my fins, re-engaging with my inner mermaid!

So that's the hardest step done now, time to start adding a few more training sessions depending on how I'm feeling day by day. I'm still struggling with fatigue so 2 - 3 days in every week I find going to work enough of a struggle so I'm crashed out on the bed or sofa by the evening. But otherwise things are looking positive.